Starting Kindergarten-How to Deal with Separation Issues

Starting any Kindergarten program can be stressful for most children, especially those who have not been in daycare. Many children find the day very long, and are used to napping. 

Saying goodbye at the classroom door can be unnerving for parents when children start to cry. While some tears are perfectly normal, excessive crying can be a sign that your child may need a different way to transition to the Kindergarten program.

Here are a few tips to help. I suggest you speak directly with your child's teacher and monitor how your child is feeling after drop-off.

1) If your child is teary for a few minutes after being dropped off, then is able to join the activities, he/she will be fine in a few days.

2) If your child continues to cry for longer periods of time, ( up to half hour), there is a possibility that they are anxious, worried or scared. The "tough love'' approach may actually make the separation worse. Speak to the teacher/principal and set up a TRANSITION PLAN.

3) The transition plan allows for your child to attend for shorter periods of time, which extend in length as he/she is ready. I know it's hard for working parents, however, setting your child up for success and security are key foundations of their long-term adjustment to school.

4) Some schools will allow parents/caregivers to stay a bit longer, for a short time, to help your child engage with learning and social activities when they are calm, and feel safe.

5) Remember that young children do not have a mature sense of time, so help them understand how the day will work using a PICTURE SCHEDULE at home each morning or the night before school. They can bring it to school each day until they are comfortable. 

6) Children get anxious when they don't know who is picking them up at the end of the school day. Make sure that your child and the teacher are clear about this every day!

 Screaming, scared children are not ready to participate and engage in learning. Each child is different. Take the time to explore what is making your child anxious or scared, and work with the teacher to help them transition comfortably.  Parents know their children best. Closely monitor your child's happiness, security, eating and sleeping as they begin their Kindergarten year. If you are still concerned, make an appointment to meet with the teacher and/or principal to develop a collaborative plan.

For more suggestions or help, email me at nancylernerconsulting@gmail.com